The Obligatory “What I Am” First Post

So I’m doing this. I’m doing my first personal blog. I’ve done blogging before, mainly for professional reasons, but they were industry specific. One for my “no longer doing” professional photography business, one was a marketing blog geared towards beginners, and one was for my “stopped and now re-starting” digital marketing and web development agency. So I’m not entirely new to this “blogging thing,” but this is my first personal blog.

I’m not entirely sure what exactly I’ll be putting on here. Probably a little bit of everything that’s in my life. Parenting, web development, Raspberry Pi and Ardunio stuff, my thoughts, my hopes, my dreams, stuff related to autism, cooking…basically whatever comes to mind. Just looking for a little fun and maybe a new hobby.

PS: I apologize for the horrible reading you’re about to endure. I’m just going with a flow and I’m extremely sore from doing horribly necessary physical labor that I should really pay someone else to do. But try to enjoy it.

What am I??…

I am a dad. A stay at home dad at that for 4 years and counting. I have 2 boys who are on the autism spectrum who have completely opposite sensory needs. (Hence why I’m a stay at home dad.) I am also a geek, a budding web and software developer, lover of laughter, handyman, woodworker, photographer, knitter, former paintball player, and chocolate chip cookie monster. I’m what you call a “jack of all trades, master of none.” A well rounded guy if you will – body shape included. I love learning new things and having thoughtful, civil discussions on just about any topic.

You know what else I am? A newcomer to anxiety and depression. (More so situational/stress related depression but still.) A lot of the hobbies I enjoy, I just have no desire to do anymore. I love looking at other’s projects related to my hobbies, but doing them just sounds like a lot of work. My sex drive has also severely suffered as well. It’s not a good feeling when your mind is enjoying the touching, but your body isn’t reacting. And any hints you drop that you’re even slightly in the mood go unanswered because they’re not your typical ones and they’re so subtle, Mrs. M doesn’t pick up on it. So that’s been fun navigating these new waters…said no one ever.

So to answer the question of “What Am I,” I am I. I am me. Me is I. And I hope you’ll fun learning more about me. And the stuff I post about.

So you’re a stay at home dad…that’s cool

It’s not as cool as you think. It kind of sucks. I don’t get out of the house, like, ever. Days are pretty much wake up, deal with the boys and their shenanigans, get them to bed, fall asleep in the reclining love seat, and begrudgingly shuffle my big butt to bed at 2 a.m. There’s never any money to do anything with Mrs. M nor buy the things I would like for my “hobbies.” Because of the boys’ autism, I can’t really make any money for myself or the home, sit down for 2 mins to work on something as they’re ALWAYS wanting my attention, nor do things the easy way.

You know what the funny thing is though?? I still enjoy being a stay at home dad and I wouldn’t give it up very easily. Yeah the days are long and it sucks I can’t do a lot of the things I want or need to do, but I enjoy it. It’s hands down the hardest job I’ve ever had, but it’s…fulfilling…in a weird way. If you’re a stay at home parent, you know what I mean.

You sound interestingly…odd…

Why thank you. I appreciate the compliment.

Here’s the bit of un-odd stuff. My back story is that I’m a self taught everything person. My mother raised me 95% of the time before I was 10 (father was very much in the picture, just had some faults) and then 110% of time when my father passed away when I was 10. That kind of got me going on the self taught path of everything. Fast forward a bit, first job was in construction during the summer; was 14 at the time, then video store clerk (remember those?), wireless sales, store manager, car sales for 2 weeks (never again), and then finally a SEO Specialist for a rag tag marketing agency. I’ve owned 2 businesses – portrait and wedding photographer and a digital marketing agency. The marketing agency I’m actually restarting because when my boys first got diagnosed with autism, the behaviors that came with it started making more sense. That was when I told all 7 of my clients I could no longer complete work for them. Most were upset, but a couple were totally cool with it. But now that my youngest will be in school full time soon, I can put more effort into making the business viable. And I’m offering more services since I’m also a budding web and software developer. Been going to school for it (have 3 classes left for my degree but need more money) so may as well utilize the knowledge I have now.

Now I’m sure you’re asking yourself, “Why is doing this blog when he’s got all of…this…going on?” Because I need something to keep me sane Nancy…that’s why. But really, I’ve wanted to start a blog like this for some time. I want to make my blog as something that is fun to read, informative, gets a message across, tells stories…whatever. If I make it big, I make it big. If I don’t, that’s okay. I’ll just keep using this as a vice to escape the rest of the world.

Speaking of blog, why is it so…blah?

The reason my blog design is “blah” is because I want to make it sensory friendly. It’s to help bring awareness that even little distractions can upset someone who is on the spectrum. Kids especially, are prone to sensory issues. And those sensory issues usually happen in public, where all those videos you might see of a “spoiled brat” having a very real, very uncontrollable meltdown. So I want my blog design to highlight the importance of sensory friendliness so that you’re more focused on the content than all the pretty colors or images. And yes, I know, on the flip-side people on the spectrum usually like flowing colors and images and flashy stuff. But that’s not the message I want to convey. I want to convey making an inclusive world for those who do have neurological disorders where something as simple as a light blue navigation bar might cause their skin to crawl. I want my blog to be a place where everyone feels comfortable in their own skin…so to speak…

There you have it. All 53.7 and 4/3rds% of what I wanted to say in a jumbled mess. Hopefully I didn’t pull on your heart strings too much. But I was talkative. And I wanted to give you as much info as I could mentally muster. And hopefully you’ll come back to learn more about what it’s like being a stay at home parent, woodworking, probably some marketing advice, general rants, geek related stuff, philosophical thoughts, political opinions, and maybe even some fictional story writing. Options are limitless right now so let’s have some fun.

Allons-y,
Mr. M

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